This week, I turned t w e n t y - t h r e e.
HB to me!
Twenty-two was fun! I had some great time with friends and family, progressed in the 'job world', gaining more experience and getting some jobs under my belt. But, if I am completely honest, I feel like I should of achieved more in that year. I don't like to have regrets, so I don't regret anything I did or didn't do, but I do like to learn from my mistakes and move forward.
I'm in a tricky part of life, post uni but not quite fully into adult life - still living at home, not earning enough to move out. Don't get me wrong, I love living with my mum but ultimately, my goal is to get a job and to earn enough to move out, like most people my age. This year I became self-employed, but that is HARD, seriously hard, which I most definitely underestimated. I'll most likely have some big decisions to make and paths to chose and I want twenty-three to be a year of progress and good choices.
Here's some thing I've learnt in my year of being twenty-two. Things I want to work on next year, reminders of what cherish and some general life advice about drinking too many margaritas...
Nothing is permanent
Things come to an end, both good and bad, which is always worth remembering. But I also need to remind myself that I have the ability to put a stop to things that aren't making me happy and that I am allowed to put myself first sometimes.
If I don't do it, no one else will do it for me
No one else will make that important phone call for me. No one else will apply for that job for me. I put 'scary tasks' off for as long as possible, which means they niggle at my brain for weeks on end. I'm well aware no one else is going to do it, so what am I waiting for?
Weekends are Weekends
I feel a real guilt when I switch off at the weekends, but working for myself it's very important I do. I'm not working full-time so I also feel the guilt that I shouldn't be relaxing because I haven't worked a full week. This year has to be about focused weeks and fun weekends!
You should always listen to your Mum
When your mum tells you to wear a coat, wear a coat! When you don't tell your mum you're getting two piercings in your ear, but know she'd tell you not to, TELL HER and listen to her. Otherwise put up with ongoing ear piercing infections for a month, cry a lot, take a trip to minor injuries and eventually have to take one out anyway. (Oops. Soz Mumma)
The value of friendship
I've always loved my girlfriends and they have always been such supportive, fun and all round babes. But this year, my friends smushed (is that a word?) together - my childhood friend, my school friend, my sister from another Mr and I are one solid girl group and I can't even explain to you the happy feels it gives me. It can be hard having separate groups of friends - you want to be with all of them all the time - so when you smush them together and it works it is the best! My other bestie Luce also moved back from Manchester and it's so good to have her closer to home! Win win for friendships!
I have no idea what I'm doing, but I don't think anyone else does either.
Reassure me on this one, does anyone actually know how to adult? Like, taxes what? Contracts, business, budgeting, making big decisions, anyone have a clue? With age comes experience, so I'm going with that and suppose I will learn as I go on!
Other peoples opinions don't matter
This, of course, is within reason. The opinions of your nearest and dearest are important to consider as they're likely to have your best interests at heart. But the opinion of random school friends your haven't seen for four years or Facebook friend you haven't spoken to for eight years not so much. I worry about the tiniest things, down to things as small as posting a photo 'ah, what if they think I've got a big ego?' 'is it vain to post a selfie?' 'what if I'm posting too much and it's annoying?' Ridiculous. If something is making you happy no one should have a problem with it.
If they do, well... bye felicia.
Put the phone down
A serious wake up call to iPhone addiction was downloading the app 'Moment'. It tracks the time you spend on your phone every day and what apps you're spending the most time on, it then gives you a daily report with a summary. It is absolutely shocking! I have to put my phone down and care less about what is happening online. It's there now and it will still be there in an hour.
Tidy Room. Tidy Mind.
Not exactly a news flash here, but the importance of a tidy desk space/office/room is insane! I can't focus properly unless everything's tidy, so it's the absolute worst for procrastination.
Most Importantly...
A night of drinking Margaritas will be full of salsa dancing, hilarious boomerangs and cry laughing, but will leave you feeling like you have ERODED YOUR INSIDES AWAY AND HAVE NO TEETH LEFT the next morning. You'll text the girls and all agree to not drink them again for a while. Next month another Girl's Night rolls around and you'll hear the call of the marg and you'll make the same mistakes again.
So, here's to twenty-three!
A year of caring less, working more and having fun.
And as my birthday card from my Mumma so aptly said...
'A wise woman once said 'fuck this shit', and she lived happily ever after...'
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Imagine you're 15 years old, still growing, still developing, still learning.
Imagine one of the safest places you can be has become a place of fear, terror and danger.
Imagine waking up every morning, dreading seeing that one teacher, that group of boys or that man who comments and stares as you pass him everyday.
Imagine being robbed of your childhood.
Imagine being robbed of your childhood.
There are millions of girls who don't have to imagine this, it's their life on a daily basis.
I know I like to keep Love On The Wall a place for happiness, but Plan UK asked me to talk about a very serious issue and I really wanted to spread awareness and find some ways we can help.
This school year, 246 million children will be affected by violence at school worldwide.
This school year, 246 million children will be affected by violence at school worldwide.
Worldwide, 62 million girls don't go to school - violence is one of the reasons why. In the UK, 60% of girls ages 13 to 21 reported sexual harassment at school or college and more than 5,500 alleged sex crimes and 600 rapes in schools were reported to the police in the last three years.
This video below speaks not a thousand, but a million words. This is what real girls are experiencing in their terrifyingly, very real, everyday lives.
What are Plan doing to help?
- Plan have launched a 'Because I am a girl' campaign which helps ensure girls can access a safe and quality education all over the world.
- They've set up child protection communities in schools in Kenya & Zimbabwe, where children and staff can report any concerns.
- Ensuring girls have a voice. In Uganda they have supported girls to go to parliament and talk to their MP's on how to stop violence and discrimination.
- Running workshops for boys and men to teach them about the importance of treating girls with respect.
What can I do to help? Us girls have gotta stand up for each other!
DONATE!
Just click here to go to their donation page, you can choose between monthly donations or a one off donation. Absolutely anything you can give will help! Heres a few things that your kind donations will help towards...
£5 a month could train community workers in Bangladesh to register births. This means girls can prove their age and claim their rights.
£9.40 a month could help 10 girls a year have access to ChildLine Kenya.
£96 could provide a three month scholarship to a girl in El Salvador that will allow her to earn her own income.
This video below speaks not a thousand, but a million words. This is what real girls are experiencing in their terrifyingly, very real, everyday lives.
What are Plan doing to help?
- Plan have launched a 'Because I am a girl' campaign which helps ensure girls can access a safe and quality education all over the world.
- They've set up child protection communities in schools in Kenya & Zimbabwe, where children and staff can report any concerns.
- Ensuring girls have a voice. In Uganda they have supported girls to go to parliament and talk to their MP's on how to stop violence and discrimination.
- Running workshops for boys and men to teach them about the importance of treating girls with respect.
What can I do to help? Us girls have gotta stand up for each other!
DONATE!
Just click here to go to their donation page, you can choose between monthly donations or a one off donation. Absolutely anything you can give will help! Heres a few things that your kind donations will help towards...
£5 a month could train community workers in Bangladesh to register births. This means girls can prove their age and claim their rights.
£9.40 a month could help 10 girls a year have access to ChildLine Kenya.
£96 could provide a three month scholarship to a girl in El Salvador that will allow her to earn her own income.
JOIN THE CAMPAIGN!
You can sign up to join Plan's campaign to stand up for girls around the world and to say no to violence.
LOOK OUT FOR EACH OTHER!
Speak out if you are in danger. Look out for friends who you feel could be unsafe. Talk to responsible adults. Don't keep inappropriate behaviour, from bullying to sexual harassment, a secret in fear of the repercussions, it will be a lot worse if you keep things to yourself. Don't let them win.
Every girl has the right to Learn Without Fear.
If you'd like to learn more out this campaign, click here to go to Plan's 'Learn Without Fear' page.
#LearnWithoutFear
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